Starstruck

Dear TJ,

I love you.

- Megan

Thoughts from El train

I'm about to wet myself, the people around me have no idea how cool this
scruffy girl in the wrinkled shirt, unwashed hair, and glasses REALLY
is. For tonight, on my last night in "The Lottery" among other awesome
improvisers from the Second City Mainstage and other cool places, I get
to play on stage with T.J. Jagadowski. For those of you not familiar
with the Chicago improv world I will try to relate how cool this man
is. He's only THE BEST! He plays these amazing, true to life
characters that are so subtle... Freakin amazing! His two person show
"TJ and Dave" with Dave Pasquesi has sold out almost every Wednesday
night at 11pm for years!

But for those of you still not getting why I can't sit still...

Improv legend says that he's the guy who turned down Saturday Night
Live. Yep. Lorne Michaels called him and he was like, "eeeeehh...nope"
and then Tina Fey called him and asked him as a personal friend to
reconsider and TJ was like,"Tina, baby, you're sweet, but I'm cool where
I'm at." Those aren't direct quotes, but that's how it got relayed to
me.

He was supposed to replace Will Ferrell, and I'm performing with him
tonight. Wheeeee!

Yeah!

Success!

Dear Roasted Chicken,

You are so tasty. I love you.

- Megan

You feel tense, little bird.

So today I embarked on another new adventure. Another entry in the list
of firsts Meegs has tried on the Chicago adventure.

I cooked a Chicken.

Now as most of you know, I DO know how to cook chicken breasts. Many of
you have tasted the wonderful creations George Foreman and I have
whipped up together. However, this is my first attempt to roast a full
chicken, bones and all.

I have to say that preparing a whole raw chicken is probably one of the
grossest, most disgusting things I've ever done in my life. Its right
up there with sleeping in a bedroom with an 8in spider on the loose on
the "this gives me the willies" meter. Did you know there are hearts
and livers and necks inside those packaged chickens? And you have to go
in there with your hand and get them out? Its true. If the perdue
company takes the time to pluck off the feathers and shrinkwrap them I'm
plastic, can't they be bothered to get rid of the yucky bits too? And
then there's a little butt bone on the end...

So I made the chicken dance in the sink for a while, and the "giblets"
(a colloquialism derived from "gross bits") finally fell out. Then I
gave the chicken a bath. Chicken armpits feel eerily human. I gave her
a quick BSE because the best prevention is early detection, you know.
Then I patted her dry and warmed up some olive oil in my hands and gave
her a good rub down. As I got to a particularly tight spot between her
2nd and 3rd thoracic vertebrae I asked her if she had any traumatic
events in her life recently. When she didn't answer I freaked out
because I remembered she's a chicken carcass, and her muscles are tight
because she's dead. And that ladies and gentlemen is why I quit massage
therapy school.

So I put her in Reynolds body bag with some veggies and garlic and
patted her little chicken butt goodbye.

I miss her already. All that is left is her scent lingering in the
kitchen. It smells pretty damn good.

Tell em Pete sent you.

I got home from the grocery store and turned on the TV and there was my
favorite scene from Runaway Bride starring my former GMU teacher Kevin
M.

Phil says 6 more months of winter!

This is a pic of Maddy and Marilyn in front of the town square in
Woodstock IL. Apparently this is the town where most of the movie
"Groundhog Day" was filmed. I could totally see it. We were freezing so
we went into some shops and eventually Maddy and I bought ice cream
cones to warm up. Somehow it didn't work as planned, but it was yummy.

Wax on, Morita-San, Wax on.

Happy Thanksgiving

So I've found myself in a lovely house in Crystal Lake, IL for the
holiday. I think this is going to be fun. Maddy and I are on air
mattresses in the living room. Her mom put Maddy's new headshot in a
frame with the other family photos. The autograph says, "What can I
say, you created me!"

Its perfect ...except for the CATS lurking in the shadows, waiting to
pounce, on my sinuses and any other phlegm-producing targets they might
find. Guess I won't be wearing my contacts tomorrow.

Michael: Where is he?
Lucille: On the Balcony.
Michael: Of his own free will?
Lucille: Fifty-fifty

Buster: Mother's becoming a little controlling.
Michael: What tipped you off? When she locked you out on the balcony
again?
Buster: That was kind of my fault... I thought I saw a graham cracker
out there.
Michael (to Lucille): You baited the balcony?
Lucille: Prove it.

White Thanksgiving

Views from my front door and the Irving Park El station.
- Megan

"Everything you could ever want or be you already have and are."

Dustin Hoffman - I Heart Huckabees

Gorillaz n stuff

Today at lunch there was a gorilla in a t-shirt standing on the corner.
I thought about taking a picture, but in my experience gorillas never
seem to want to get their picture taken. I was worried that he might be
cold without pants, but there was nothing I could do about it. I didn't
worry about him being hungry, because I imagine Mr. Peanut is still
running around there somewhere.

Have I mentioned how Chicago feels like such a small town, sometimes?
Maybe not when I've been on a bus for an hour on my way to an open mic
in the north suburbs to do some improv. But when I've only been living
here 4 months and I start running into people I know like every day
either on the street or El train, it feels good. Maybe its not really
Chicago, but actually Improvtown that's small.

Being part of the Chicago improv world is kind of like being back in
college. I'm constantly seeing people I know on my way to somewhere
else, and we can geek out about our stuff in public without fear of
confused looks.

Yesterday I was bundled up on the train with only my glasses exposed to
the air when suddenly Jason C, my teacher friend (NOT my "feature trend"
- Jason doesn't drink. Besides that's a special title reserved for
Razowsky) sits on the seat facing me. Its a six car train that runs
every five minutes, what are the odds? Then the train got stuck a
couple times so we talked about class, summer intensive peeps, the role
of women and minorities in improv, and 80s music for almost an hour on
the way to our boring day jobs.

Then today on my way home on El Train I'm zoning out in my cocoon of
wool, down, and polartec, when I hear a guy standing next to me on his
cell phone leaving a message, "Hey, its Regan, call me back" and I look
and sure enough, its Regan from my Second City class. (Also the mythical
MEgan and REgan show) Regan can be seen beginning this weekend as
Michael Bolton in "Office Space The Musical" so I filled him in on the
open mic night he had missed and we plotted and planned for the future.
Second City people seem to be more focused on acting as a career than
I.O. peeps and I'm totally down with that vibe.

I love having people to talk to! About improv! I thought I had friends
at Curves... And I did/do, but they would do that thing where they'd
say, "be funny! Now!" and that was awkward. Now that I'm with My
People they challenge me to be funny and creative naturally. Yes. I
found my people. We are a nomadic race. Spread all over the world. We
have a rich history. We have suffered through great trials. I have
come here to the promised land to live on a comedy kibbutz for the next
2 years and cultivate funny.

Also while I'm writing this novel of an entry, I should mention that Z
has been really great to me lately. I'm always so quick to tell stories
that comically make him out as the bad guy, so I should share the good
times too. Maybe I've lowered my expectations. Maybe its because I
have more friends so I'm not as needy. Or maybe its cause he's curbed
his substance abuse and is back in the acting game. Whatever the
reason, I've noticed an improvement and it feels really great to have my
Zach friend back.

On the down side of things, I've pretty much convinced myself that I
have a brain tumor because I get tingly and see stars sometimes. Now
that I have health insurance I should probably get that checked out. Or
maybe eat better... Spagetti O's and ramen don't exactly boast essential
vitamins and minerals.

maybe its fumes from the space heaters?
- Megan

Holy F@#&

If the High is 30 degrees and the Low is 20, then why is is now 15
degrees outside? Isn't that the whole point of the high and the low?
To give us some structure/guidelines to live by?
- Megan

Ho-leeee CRAP!

Its a balmy 30 degrees today in Chicagoland. I'm starting to doubt all
the improvisers who told me to study in Chicago instead of LA.

Actually, I don't doubt them, because I believe they were right about
the level of commitment of the improv movement here. However, I'm
beginning to hate them for talking me into living through this weather.
It feels like some kind of wierd hazing/torture that improvisers have to
go through to be accepted into the national improv frat. I feel like
I'm blindfolded and standing on the edge of what I think is a ravine.
And those LA guys are laughing and shouting, "Freeze little fat girl!
Freeze!" But as soon as I get to take the blindfold off I'll discover
that I'm actually just on a platform 2 inches from the ground and the
improv guys are in lawn chairs and they have an extra PBR waiting for
me. If I can only survive long enough to get the blind fold off, I
could be sitting around with them laughing at the next guy going through
hell.
- Megan

Da Bears

The Coach Ditka pork chops. In your grocer's freezer.

On the El

Dear Crazy Lady,

You kinda creep me out the way you're talking to yourself. I'm kind of
annoyed by you, but I love you anyway. I guess.

- Megan

Letter to the City

Dear City of Chicago,

You are cold, and sometimes you smell like poo. But still, I love you.

- Megan

A Wreck

Dear Potbelly Sandwich Works,

I love you.

- Megan

Chicago Card Plus

Dear Chicago Card,

I love you.

- Megan

Highlights from A. D. Season 2

Gob: Alright... Well we should circumvant union penalties.
Michael: Circumvent
Gob: Circumverate
Michael: Circumvent...it means to go around
Gob: Ahh yes, the old reach around

Buster (climbing out of the trunk and under a trampoline in the
houskeeper's yard): Mexico! This shall keep me safe from the hot
Mexican sun!
Lupe: What are you doing?
Buster (in a bad Mexican accent): I'm trying to find a place to live!!

Arrested Development
Sorry, Blockbuster.com, you are NEVER getting it back!

How nerdy am I?

I can listen to my headphones while I run the envelope stuffer and
postage meter at work. So what cd do I choose almost every time?

The Postal Service.

I swear it was an accident the first time.

But you know what makes me REALLY happy. I'm eatin spagetti-o's.

mmmm.

The Onion | America's Finest News Source

http://mobile.theonion.com/content/node/42166
- Megan

We work hard... But play harder.

This is my new boss. Its 5:00 on Friday so we are drinkin beers and
singin along with Journey. I feel like this job is totally meant to
be. "Don't Stop Believing" has been one of my main theme songs this
entire Chicago adventure.
- Megan

Poor actors refuse to throw anything away

Hey, an overhead projector! I could SO use that!
- Megan

Blogtime

Lunch is my favorite part of the day. Not just because of the obvious
food part, but because I have a chance to read my friends' blogs. Keep
em updated, kids! I still haven't made any office friends and I have
nowhere else to go!

...except to wander around the city stalking Mr. Peanut. That was
wierd... The reason I only got a shot of his back is because he was
flitting around dodging people on the sidewalk and stuff and
occaisionally running out into traffic. Chicago is an odd place.

dear Jesus

I seem to have misplaced my iPod.
Love,
- Megan