Sometimes I feel like people only call me when they need stuff from me. I know for a fact that this is not true, but sometimes I can't help but feel that way anyways. My therapist pointed out that I tend to put the problems and emergencies of my friends vastly ahead of my own. Therefore, do people only call me when they need me? Or do I only respond when I feel needed? So do I bring this on myself? After years and years of my complacency has everyone else given up on trying to be social with me? So now people don't bother calling me unless they are at the end of their rope. So the only calls I get are full of dramatic desperation. I feel that because of this constant state of panic, the ring of the telephone causes me more anxiety than any of you could possibly imagine. No good ever comes from the telephone. It is always the bearer of bad news and the awakener from naps. A beautiful dream is shattered and my heart is left pounding and audibly thumping as I lay in the dark trying to regain unconciousness.

I like being needed, but sometimes I'd rather be wanted instead.